BOUNDARIES.....

by Abraxis Blackwell on December 08, 2018

Happy Saturday!

In my introduction I stated I would touch on boundaries more in the blog section, so here it is!

Ugggghh….I will be the absolute first to admit that setting boundaries is not FUN nor is it easy. As I am working on it, I am learning that the problem isn’t setting them it is sticking to them and maintaining them.

When you think of boundaries they aren’t set to intentional hurt anyone’s feelings {although they may initially}, if they are set correctly they should lead to more fulfilling relationships in all areas of your life.

Soooooo why do we feel so guilty?!? One reason that I struggled with boundaries is because I didn’t believe {subconsciously} I was deserving of self-care and self-love. The hard truth for me was learning the difference between self-love and self-confidence. I have all the confidence in the world, nevertheless when it came to self-love I lacked in that area and I am currently working on daily. I discovered often time’s I put everyone’s feelings before my own and settled for less than I deserved {this was TRULY a pivotal moment for me}.

When a relationship is established we teach people how to treat us {good and bad} by what we accept or don’t accept, in some cases time passes and we may not still be fulfilled or happy in that relationship. That is OK we can always reset and realign {boundaries} as needed in order not to feel resentful to other people and most importantly be self-fulfilled.

The two things I am working on being intentional about are:

  • Being extremely clear and concise on what I will and will not accept, making sure this is articulated clearly {some people don’t get subliminal message}.
  • Developing the ability to say no without being afraid or feeling guilty {although feeling extremely uncomfortable}.

 

Leave a comment sharing how you have set boundaries or an area you struggle in setting them!

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